Wednesday, December 1, 2010

So it’s been forever… as usual. I actually really just suck at this whole blogging thing. But I’m going to give it another go, simply because I’m on a plane- and my mind runs wild on plans. Thoughts of life and what the hell I’m doing with mine fill my head as I’m staring out the window on my way to the most magical place on earth- Disney World. Yesss. I can’t freaking wait. My family has been through a lot lately, and it feels so good to escape. I’m kind of hungry though. The flight attendent just gave me some pretzels, but I ate mine way to fast. And now, I catch myself with consistent pauses in my typing just so I can dig my fingers to the bottom of the pretzel bag and get all the leftover salt on my nails then suck it off. Ew. Why am I so gross?

Anyways back to life. Isn’t funny how planes make you think. For some reason whenever I am in the air, I look out the window and pretend I’m going somewhere else. Even if I love where I am actually going, I still come up with all these alternate egos in my head. Tonight I imagined I was flying to Paris, alone. Perhaps I am a writer going to do a story? Maybe I’m going to Paris to fall in love, or have a sexy affair? (HA right lauren) I have also been pretending that I am on a spaceship. It’s nighttime and all the lights below me resemble galaxies and stars of the universe. And I’m on my way back to the mother ship. Okay so I probably just took this whole thing way to far. Ha. Back to reality. In just a few months, I really will be going to Paris- for an entire year. I’m so fortunate. And I cannot wait for the excitement ahead. I just love to travel. I’m pretty sure I’m addicted. And I have basically made a vow to myself to never sit still again. Life’s an adventure, ay? I can’t be wasting any time.

Tiiimee. I have such a love/hate relationship with time. There is just so much I want to do, when am I going to do it all? I have to be a princess in Disney World, write a memoir, run a marathon, study for a year in France, teach English in China, hold a koala bear in Australia, cycle across the US. And that doesn’t even graze the surface. But I guess I’m doing pretty well for myself. I just get so antsy in Tennessee. It’s too familiar. I feel like I know everything about this place. And I have to work really hard to surround myself by new things everyday, or else I’m pretty sure I would go ballistic. Knoxville can be a tad toxic at times. And since last August my life has been turned upside down- I do not even know what to do with normality anymore. I think that is why I go places. In just the past year and a half, I have been sooo many places. Not just 11 different countries—I’ve been to LA, Napa, San Francisco, Vegas, Colorado, New York City, Houston, Boston, Cape Cod, Atlanta, Charleston, Seaside, New Orleans, and more. It doesn’t even cross my mind as being a lot though, and it’s not like I’m throwing a ton of money towards all of these places, stuff just comes up, and I go. I’m just always going. I hope maybe one day I will find someone to go with me…but that’s a whole separate conversation.

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